Polite Spanish Phrases: Please, Excuse Me and Softer Requests
Sound polite in Spanish: por favor, disculpe, con permiso, conditional requests and the small courtesies that make a big difference.
By Ayoub Farid · · 2 min read
Being polite in Spanish isn't just adding por favor. Native speakers soften requests, greet before asking and use small courtesies that English speakers often skip. Here's how to sound respectful in any situation.
The basics
- Por favor — please
- Gracias — thank you
- De nada / Con gusto — you're welcome
- Perdón — sorry / pardon
- Disculpe (formal) / Disculpa (informal) — excuse me (to get attention)
- Con permiso — excuse me (to pass, or to leave the table)
- Lo siento — I'm sorry (for something bad)
Softer requests
Direct commands can sound rude. Soften them:
| Direct | Softer | Softest |
|---|---|---|
| Dame un café. | ¿Me da un café? | ¿Me podría dar un café, por favor? |
| Quiero la cuenta. | La cuenta, por favor. | ¿Nos trae la cuenta, por favor? |
| Ayúdame. | ¿Me ayudas? | ¿Me podría ayudar, por favor? |
The magic words: quisiera (I would like), ¿podría…? (could you…?), ¿me da…? (could you give me…?).
Always greet first
In many Spanish-speaking countries, starting with a question without a greeting feels abrupt. Instead of "¿Dónde está el baño?", say "Buenas tardes, disculpe, ¿dónde está el baño?"
Usted for respect
Use usted with:
- older people, including your partner's parents at first;
- doctors, officials, shop staff (in many countries);
- anyone you don't know well.
See tú vs usted.
Polite phrases for everyday moments
- Buen provecho. — Enjoy your meal (said to people eating).
- Salud. — Bless you / Cheers.
- Que le vaya bien. — Have a good day (formal).
- Pase, por favor. — Come in / after you.
- Está en su casa. — Make yourself at home.
- ¿Le molesta si…? — Do you mind if…?
Mexico's extra politeness
- ¿Mande? — Pardon? (instead of ¿qué?)
- Para servirle. — At your service.
- Con su permiso. — Excuse me (very polite).
Mini dialogue at a shop
- You: Buenos días. Disculpe, ¿tiene esta camisa en talla mediana?
- Dependienta: Sí, claro. Permítame un momento.
- You: Muchas gracias, muy amable.
Practice
Politeness shows most in tone and habit. Lolo's café and doctor calls give you natural spots to practice quisiera, ¿me podría…? and usted, with gentle tips afterwards. See also thank you in Spanish and how to say sorry in Spanish.
Frequently asked questions
Is "quiero" rude when ordering?
Not rude, but quisiera or ¿me da…? sounds softer and more polite.
What's the difference between "perdón" and "disculpe"?
Both work. Disculpe is common for getting attention; perdón for small apologies.
Should I use usted in Mexico?
Yes, with older people and strangers. It's a sign of respect.
